29 Eylül 2012 Cumartesi

Facebook: Deactivated.

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Two weeks ago, I made a very tough decision. I deactivated Facebook. 

After a lengthy conversation with J, we decided it was the right thing to do. It's hard and sort of makes me feel like I'm living under a rock. However, I stand behind my decision to disconnect because I recognize that the positives far outweigh the negatives during this season of our life.
You might be thinking, "is she crazy?" or "why on earth would she delete Facebook?" The answer is I might be crazy but I am so happy I took the plunge and signed off... And here's why:
1. My iPhone was solely used as a tool to obsessively check Facebook. I would seriously look for updates every few minutes! In my life, I aspire to live in moderation and the obsessive checking was not healthy. It was so bad that I picked up my phone for a few days after I deactivated my account to hit the precious blue app only to find that it was removed.
2. Because of my obsessive Facebook "stalking", my iPhone became a third person in my marriage. It was always in my hand and took away from my ability to engage in conversations with my spouse. J said it was my "first love". Anything that comes before your marriage needs to be examined, friends. With that realization, I knew I had to make a change.
3. My productivity was stunted. Every time I was on the computer, Facebook was looming in the background. I am a full-time college student and a full-time employee. These responsibilities require focus and that was compromised by my frequent Facebook checks. While online doing research projects, any time I would get bored, I would jump on for a "second" and get totally side tracked from the task in front of me.
4. J and I spent two weeks this Summer in Haiti. One thing we loved most about Haitian culture was their sense of community. Haitians are not bound by their phones, computers, etc. They interact with folks the old fashioned way. They build strong relationships by spending face to face time with one another. When I deactivated my account, I asked my friends to text me more, invite me for coffee or send me an e-mail. I don't want my relationships to be built on status updates. I want them to mean something. Facebook and other social media tools can rob us from true friendships. 
5. Facebook like other forms of Social Media, can make us feel depressed. Several articles recently published indicate that social media is directly linked to depression. Although, I never felt depressed by viewing Facebook, I did often have to check my "Keeping up with the Joneses" attitude. Immediate thoughts would pop up like "why aren't we having fun?" "why can't we do?" "maybe we should buy". Those thoughts are unhealthy and forces others to live in a  world of comparison. I choose not to do that. 
Since I've been Facebook free, I feel much better. My husband and I are growing closer together, I am more productive and have less overall stress. While I don't believe that deleting Facebook is for everyone, I believe it was the right decision for me and my family. Please do not hear me say that forms of Social Media or Facebook is a bad thing... It's really great in some instances. I still frequent Twitter, Pinterest and read blogs but I had to unplug from my stronghold. Until I feel like I can exercise a little more self-control, I won't be back on Facebook... and I'm ok with that.
Tell me: If you struggle with balance due to Facebook, do you think you could ever deactivate it?

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